>A few years ago, Richard Black, president of the Society for the Elimination
>of all Truth, kindly released "The Definitive Guide to Life" which compiles
>some of the best herd-wisdom that has ever been created:
>
>
>
> THE DEFINITIVE GUIDE TO LIFE
>
> (125 proverbs to live by)
>
>
> The Definitive Guide to Life is one of the best works I have
> seen in a long time. It was submitted to "Life and Death"
> anonymously on a few scraps of paper, but I wouldn't let this
> put you off. Truly, it is a work of rare beauty and insight.
> It manages to distill the very best wisdom from the entire
> three thousand years of human history.
>
> The great thing about this particular guide is its brevity,
> allowing the reader quick and easy access to its treasures
> without having to wade through all the unnecessary padding.
> All you ever wanted to know about life is now right at your
> finger tips! Read and enjoy.
> - Professor Robert Black
>
>
>
> The Definitive Guide to Life.
> -------------------------------
>
> 1.
>
> Everything is uncertain.
>
> The Buddha shits, the same as anyone.
>
> Your truths may be true for you.
>
> All truths are opinions.
>
> Your opinion is not the only valid one.
>
> The opposite of every great truth is equally true.
>
> There are two sides to every coin.
>
> The world is too complex to comprehend.
>
> Our brains are too limited to understand reality.
>
> We are not meant to know the Truth.
>
> It is my right to be ignorant.
>
> Everything is meaningless.
>
> Nothing matters.
>
>
> 2.
>
> Look for the Truth if you must, but don't find it.
>
> The search is what's important.
>
> Anyone who thinks they know something is a fool.
>
> It is better to travel than arrive.
>
> The wisest man is he who does not believe he is wise.
>
> Those who speak do not know.
>
> The older I grow, the less I know.
>
>
> 3.
>
> Reason is useless.
>
> Thinking gets you nowhere.
>
> The great philosophers themselves used reason and they didn't
> agree.
>
> Plato was a great man.
>
> Descartes possessed courage.
>
> Kant had integrity.
>
> Hume was honest.
>
> It is an exaggeration to say that Western philosophy is
> thoroughly evil.
>
> The great questions of life are unsolvable.
>
>
> 4.
>
> Whatever you do, do it in moderation.
>
> The best things carried to excess are wrong.
>
> A wise person is anyone who follows a middle course.
>
> Contentment is the highest virtue.
>
> We will never know the reason for our existence, not until we
> die at least.
>
> No one will ever know why the evil prosper and the good suffer.
>
> Our suffering will always be a mystery.
>
>
> 5.
>
> All religions proclaim the one God.
>
> If there was no God, life would be meaningless.
>
> All religions are spiritual.
>
> Meditation and prayer leads to enlightenment.
>
> Christians are spiritual; atheists are materialists.
>
> Anyone who wears robes and smiles is spiritual.
>
> The Pope and the Dalai Lama are spiritual men.
>
> Mother Theresa is good, while Hitler is evil.
>
> Doing good is good.
>
> Keep going to church.
>
> Submit.
>
> Humility is the greatest of all virtues.
>
>
> 6.
>
> People who judge are evil.
>
> Do not judge others.
>
> Stop being judgmental.
>
> Truth brings forth hatred.
>
> To think is to differ.
>
> Thinking causes pain.
>
> Thinking upsets people.
>
> The highest virtue is to accept our limitations and tolerate
> other people's weaknesses.
>
> You must tolerate other people's views.
>
> You must have faith in people.
>
> There are more good people in the world than bad.
>
>
> 7.
>
> Man is born to believe.
>
> We cannot live without hope.
>
> Hope feeds the soul.
>
> Without hope, we would never get out of bed
>
> Everything's going to be alright.
>
>
> 8.
>
> Have the courage to believe in yourself.
>
> Don't listen to other people.
>
> Let nobody deter you from doing what you believe is right.
>
> You are important.
>
> You only live once.
>
> History never repeats.
>
>
> 9.
>
> The Devil finds work for idle hands.
>
> I earn a wage, therefore I am good.
>
> Businessmen are virtuous.
>
> A busy life is a virtuous life.
>
> There is no substitute for hard work.
>
> Work harder and run faster than everyone else.
>
> One should aim to live a rich and varied existence.
>
> Variety is the spice of life.
>
>
>
> 10.
>
> Honour your parents.
>
> Pursue a career.
>
> Get married.
>
> Love your wife unconditionally.
>
> Family means everything to me.
>
> Having children puts everything in perspective.
>
> Children are valuable.
>
> Always listen to little children.
>
>
>
> 11.
>
> Motherly love is pure and selfless.
>
> Mothers are saints.
>
> The feminine is the spiritual aspect of ourselves.
>
> Our emotions are spiritual.
>
> Christmas is a special time of year.
>
>
> 12.
>
> Women have souls.
>
> Women think.
>
> Women are conscious.
>
> You can't judge a woman from the dress she wears.
>
>
> 13.
>
> Men and women are equal.
>
> Women are more emotionally mature than men.
>
> Women are more caring than men.
>
> Women are less violent than men.
>
> Women are less egotistical than men because they are less
> dominating.
>
> It is wrong to think of women as slaves to fashion. A part of
> them is deeper.
>
> Women are not victims.
>
>
> 14.
>
> Everybody needs somebody to love.
>
> Love one another.
>
> Without love, there is nothing.
>
> Love is wonderful.
>
> Love conquers all.
>
> The world needs more love.
>
> A hug a day keeps the demons at bay.
>
> The more love, the less war.
>
>
> 15.
>
> Lighten up, for heaven's sake!
>
> Don't take yourself seriously.
>
> Concentrate on the positives.
>
> Always look on the bright side of life.
>
> It is better to be entertaining than wise.
>
> A smile goes a long away.
>
> Laughter is the best medicine.
>
> If you can't find something pleasant to say about someone, then
> say nothing at all.
>
> Put people at their ease.
>
> Never make an enemy.
>
> Dare to be naive.
>
>
> 16.
>
> Relax.
>
> Take it easy.
>
> We are meant to be happy.
>
> If it feels good, do it.
>
> If you've got it, flaunt it.
>
> We can do what we want, as long as we don't hurt anyone else.
>
> Anything you do is right.
>
> Do what works.
>
> Don't fight it.
>
> Anything which feels this good can't be wrong.
>
> Go with the flow.
>
> Everything just *is*.
>
> Be happy.
>
>
>--
>
>Taken from the magazine "Life and Death" - a publication by the Society for
>the Elimination of All Truth (SEAT), an organization dedicated to ridding
>the world of enlightenment and truth.
>
>--
>
>
>David Quinn
>
>
>
>
Joe E. Dees
Poet, Pagan, Philosopher