On Wednesday, March 05, 1997 10:33 PM, Tony Hindle =
t.hindle@joney.demon.co.uk wrote:
... what would be the best "meme-complex". For me to encourage to grow =
in my
child's mind=20
Choose your first principles (you want your kid to agree with you).
Choose utilitarian principles appropriate to the milieu the child will =
grow up in (what will get you beat up on today's playgrounds may be =
different than it was when you were a kid, and it does matter).
Choose memes that make child rearing easier (e.g., when your child says =
"can I have that", instead of saying "we can't afford it" and having the =
child doubt you. Say instead "I am saving my money for x. "It's true and =
what can the kid say. Plus it gets them in the habit of not thinking =
that affording is getting. You don't have to point out that you're =
saving your money to pay last months light bill.)
Choose memes that will make dealing with your child as an adult easier =
(e.g., instead of saying as long as your in my house and I'm supporting =
you, you will treat me with respect, say one should always respect their =
parents no matter how old they are.)
Choose memes that will make your child happier (i.e., instead of saying =
that happiness comes from being in love, say happiness comes from being =
loving (result they'll practice loving the spouse they have and not quit =
when the fall out of love), instead of from wealth from achieving your =
goals, etc. See Learned Optimism, by Martin Seligman
Teach your child to shun consumer credit (to do so will require you =
shunning advertising).
Teach your child the value of tax deferred compound interest.
Require your child to visit people in the nursing home and to show extra =
courtesy to old people even when they pee on the floor. You'll need it =
someday.
Teach your child that not only is life not fair, it has no obligation to =
be so. And anyone who doesn't like it can't just go suck an egg. =
Otherwise, they'll spend their life complaining about what they deserve =
instead of delighting in not being limited to what they deserve. How =
many of us work as hard for what we have as our grandparents worked for =
less. And remember anytime you can make the grandparents heroes is good =
for you. Remember Stalin didn't get people to pray to him by building =
statues of himself but by building first statues of Lenin and paying =
homage to them. Besides Lenin was dead and your parents don't live with =
you so what's the cost of a little bowing and scraping. The child won't =
know the difference until he's forty and by then it will be too late.
that guilt by association is a fact of life. if your child doesn't like =
it remind him that there's lots of innocent people in prison who told =
their parents that they had a right to choose their own friends. and =
just because their friends were doing something wrong didn't mean they =
should be treated like they're doing something wrong. They will be. And =
they need to get used to it. And it's easier than buying Vaseline and =
preparation h for your kid when his friends get caught selling drugs and =
your kid was just visiting them and not being judgmental.
Teach your child to love reading. It's a cheap hobby. You don't have to =
buy anything just take them to the library once a week. It's quiet. A =
good memeticist teaches his children that drummers and horn players and =
hi-fi enthusiasts are all sissies, real men work on cars or computers or =
read books (all things you can sleep through on a Saturday morning.
Teach your children that nothing that is said but not recorded counts. =
It'll keep you from being obligated when they say but you said I could =
last week and you don't even remember. Also, that's how bureaucracies =
behave. And either your kids will be working for one or getting benefits =
from one or being incarcerated by one. Knowing that "but last week you =
said" doesn't count will get them farther in life and save you money.
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